The Itch

If you ever have had a brain MRI or know someone who has, you may relate to this true but embellished story. I thought I would share this story in the hope that at least, it might put a smile on your face today!

Note to reader, the truth is:
• Yes, I had a very uncomfortable brain MRI almost a year before my AD diagnosis
• Yes, I did get a horrible itch
• Yes, I did consider the history of itches as a distraction
• And heck, yeah I was determined not to have to take this MRI over again; ergo: the following really short, short-story which I outlined in my head during my merry-go-ride in the MRI

The Nightmare Itch in the MRI – Whoooahhaahaah ( Sept. 16, 2008)

This is a synopsis of my Brain-MRI experience today - - - (and yes contrary to popular belief, they did find a brain!)

The Brain MRI went good today until the last 10-15 minutes - - -

This is because I got the worst itch ever on the upper lip of my face! And this itch; which as the minutes ticked on actually felt more like it could potentially be a brain-sucking, bug-crawling monster insect creeping on my face closer and closer to my innocent yet very open inviting nostrils. Eeeek!! All this occurring while I alone lay there helplessly locked up in my MRI- ice hockey-mask-restraint. I couldn't move, scratch or swat it!!!

Helpless and alone, I decided to analyze itches as a distraction; and as my unselfish gift to mankind. So, I asked myself: "do itches go away quickly simply because we usually scratch them right away? - - Or, do they go away on their own!!??" I knew at once I had a choice, or more likely a calling. I could ignore this challenge before me or I could give the world of science an act of true selflessness; and break thru this unknown ground once and for all. This so, everyone everywhere would discover for themselves if itches truly do last forever when left unscratched!!! Whoooahhaahaah!

As I lay helplessly there in my former ice-hockey-mask now turned Hannibal Lecter’s mask-restraint, the mad angst of evil located in my carnal nature began to take over completely. I writhed in agony and wanted to scream and rip my restraints and strike out at all those who placed me in this tube of torture!

After combining several unsuccessful Swedish “humming while blowing” air techniques, the science experiment continued despairingly. But, just as I started to lose all hope, patience and what little was left of my mind that this monster MRI was supposed to be analyzing; I took one last stab at it and tried all sorts of facial contortions to release the itch. But alas, it too was of no avail. I even grew my tongue an inch and a half longer trying in vain to lick my upper lip and nostrils ( yuck!!)

And then behold a miracle!!!! It happened!!! The itch did indeed depart; and yes this was all on it's very own accord!!! Yahoo !!

Indeed, this was an anti-climatic ending; but when you consider the alternative, of not knowing the truth - - - you too can revel in the fact that America is now a much more safer and wiser place for future MRI inhabitants! And if I put some smiles on faces today, mine included well then: mission accomplished!

Many thanks out to everyone for all your prayers!

Don’t forget to breathe deeply, laugh loudly, & love God with all your heart!

Hugs, Patrice